Silence

 

I find this word fascinating, calming, infuriating, Sad, and sometimes Happiness too.

It's something that we all enjoy, or atleast I do.

We always talk about silence a the means to meditate and the peace and calm and quiet that comes with it. But rarely talk about the other parts of the silence. Which in my opinion are as important as the meditation part, on of them is the sadness and the feeling of detachment combined as one. The silence when someone is ignoring you and you feel hurt and uncared for. One more perspective that comes to my mind apart from the hurt conveying is the the peace and quiet after a long loud stressful day. And no it's different from that of meditation. 

Let's dive a little deeper into the Sadness part and try and understand as to why being quiet and avoiding words isn't always a good choice.

Imagine that you are fighting with someone(Verbally) and you decide to de-escalate the matter by remaining quite in fear of not saying things that you both may regret later and trying not to worsen the situation. Many times it happens that men don't talk till there mind is at peace and they are trying to preserve what they care about. Yes not only men but women also do this but it's mostly observed in men where they shut the other person out, claiming that they need time to cool off. But it can also be seen as you avoiding the Topic or more over A PERSON. And being avoided is an awful feeling. It feels like being discarded. It's fine to avoid talking to diffuse the argument but you must try and have a conversation sooner than later. As it will do two things :

1) Your point gets conveyed in a polite manner (Remember we are talking about a discussion and not another argument) and all the confusion and misunderstanding gets cleared earlier than later, as confusion and misunderstanding plus zero communication is a recipe to destroy not only a relationship but also marriages.

2) When YOU after a fight or a misunderstanding approach the other party to talk it conveys that you care about them. Not always in a romantic way but you do. And that at times is enough to strengthen the bond.

Words along with minor actions means a lot.

Second part that I personally connect to most is the one where I come back from work and finally have the quiet room and a peaceful shower and then sit and relax with no phone and TV. That peace hits different. Yes at some point I was of mindset that the work is over and now let's go out and party or hang out with friends but as I age, I enjoy being at home also as much as I enjoy meeting my friends. Yes there are days still were I'm like lets do something. But they are less. as after being at work(I'm a doctor by the way so when is ay work I mean Hospital duty) I like being at peace where im not expected to speak. But I'm allowed to sit in peace with no interaction relaxing not only my body but also my mind.

And as far as meditation goes yes it helps but trying to fit that everyday in a working lifestyle is difficult but as of now I haven't been able to to do so. Instead I try to go to gym and for some exercise and calming sessions.